The atmosphere is electric, the suspense is unbearable.
Leopard has retreated to his branch and there is a crowd of manic Muppets and puppeteers below scrabbling at the base of the tree for leopard steaks all round (they hungry!).
With no clear bias, Statler & Waldorf heckle from a tree branch opposite (
Lost.in.Idaho.)
Statler: Go Leopard Go!
Waldorf: Go Leopard! But you like Kermit.
Statler: Yes, come on Kermit!
Waldorf: YES! Come on Kermit!
Leopard growls menacingly to silence the old codgers.
Leopard lifts his head to the sky and howls out the 'call of the jungle' (
Astronomy Pirate) (also suggested by
Robert Fünf - who added a comical West Side Story number for paws to click to) he summons more Leopards, even Snow Leopards and Lions (
Zippy) - it remains unconfirmed if we are talking animals or operating systems on the latter two; either are relatively powerful.
Pumped full of tiger blood, Charlie Sheen hears the call too (Sheen doesn't need
phones to communicate,
Lost.in.Idaho, ; P ) but he's far too busy *WINNING!* elsewhere to assist. (
Lost.in.Idaho).
Even Big Smoke makes a return at this point, courtesy of a late vote from
amBored.
Wassup, yo? Groww street fo' life son.
Smoke throws a round or two of AK fire into the mess before realising it has nothing to do with gangsta shii', and even if it did CJ should do it since that fool needs to earn respect in the hood.
Besides which, he also spies a Leopard Tank responding to the call! (
Voit)
Vrrrrt. Clack. Brrrrrm. Gggggrrrrph.
(Because that's what tanks sound like.)
Big Smoke jumps into his fire engine and splits the scene.
At this point, the Muppet crew are surrounded by ferocious animals, a tank and various mac OS's.
Things do not look good for them. But Kermit remembers the old
Che Guevaran
saying "if it's voiced by Frank Oz, it's part of the cause..." (
Aaron M. Gipson) and from nowhere (because he can Jedi like that) Yoda appears!
He's listening to some filthy dubstep, so you know fur is going to fly!
amBored casts another random vote at this time, for Halibut. Unfortunately (or fortunately) Halibut gets fried by Yoda's light saber. It's been days since anyone's eaten so Muppet, wild animal, puppeteer, tank operator, and operating system alike all agree on a temporary truce to get stuck in to a tasty fish dish.
After lunch and a little down time for the animals to stretch out and yawn, the fight gets back under way.
It's been close the whole way (literally one vote in it, either side, I promise), but the power of Yoda's jedi skills is just that bit too much for Leopard's gang.
Kermit wins, everyone having pulled out all the stops, by one vote! (If only Charlie had come through, Leopard may have been saved). Miss Piggy gets a brand new fur coat (
G) and Kermit heads off home the victor!
So what now? Well, since Kermit was so devious (and some proposed disqualification)
Lost.in.Idaho's suggestion of a Thunderdome style cage will be required for the next round.
While all at Alphabet Wars HQ do overtime to pitch in on its construction, perhaps you guys could make suggestions for a worthy opponent for next round.
Post suggestions for next opponent (should begin with 'M') in the comments.
I would like to express my gratitude again to:
e-v-e-r-y-o-n-e, e-v-e-r-y-o-n-e,and E-V-E-R-Y-O-N-E else for your contributions.
As I keep saying you guys make this happen, so do keep it up.
or 
in the comments.
has gone the way of the dodo in our little competition. I hope it took out medical insurance because noodles pretty much walked that round with votes at at about two to one.
(which is also quite a mouthful.)
. I decided to run with that, but not quite so specific.
or 
in the comments!
against 
, but it's you guys who delivered the blows.
booms out through a 3 x 6 stack of Marshall amplification.
"
sheds his faux-nerd/faux-cool along with the glasses (
style cage (mostly from plexiglass, duct tape, pipe cleaners, paperclips and clothes hangers).
constructed, it's officially the weekend(!) so it is time to ensure (or try to ensure that) Kermit is unable to call on tag team or mob assistance....
.
.
