It was no contest in the end and Kermit was thrashed by overdriven guitar, double bass-drums and shrieking male vocal.
Here are some highlights:
- HELL YEAH Metallica FTW James looking like a Monster with cancer with that face and Ulrich Suing the hell out of all the muppets while Kirk Jams them into oblivion with a solo from the depths of hell, o yeah and Robert Trujillo on bass ripping it out with that spider pose.
- I'm going with 'METOLL!' Metal would melt Kermit's face, stomp him to the curb, be used to wipe Metallica's rears (I bet that felt feels real nice), crucified upside down, and set on fire.
- You can't kill the metal. Metal will live on. Kermit tried to kill the metal... but he FAILED! And was stricken down! [x} Metal - Not only because of Metallica, but Tenacious D rockin in the sidelines...
- Oh damn I feel bad for Kermit. Those sweet riffs shred right through his stuffing. He has no chance. Totally on it for Metallica.
- Kermit puts on his hipster glasses, and walks out of the ring, deciding that Metallica is too mainstream, bro. problem?:D
Wait just a minute there Kermie, G'n'fn'R booms out through a 3 x 6 stack of Marshall amplification.
Rock fingers are thrust into the air all around as Kermit sheds his faux-nerd/faux-cool along with the glasses (METOLL will hit a guy with spectacles by the way) and concedes.
- Metallica (and Tenacious D) would have legions of metalheads behind them, ready to shred...muppets. METOLL! all the way
- Lars points his best "Litigation Special" drumstick at the plucky amphibian and screams "KILL KERMIT!!" With that, James Hatfield heaves his guitar, and cleaves the head of his own lead guitarist in twain. "James, you stoopid a-hat, KERMIT! NOT KIRK HAMMETT!!! HOW COULD YOU BE SO G.D. STOOPID?!" "Me sorry, Lars...*sigh* Beer good...beer good" Kermit steps forward, "Hey guys, I have Dave Mustane's number if you need it..."
- All that long hair, sweat and studs, the noise will blow the frogs legs off.
- Metallica knows how to Seek And Destroy to Kill'Em All. They will leave Kirmit and the the gang Broken, Beat And Scared, and be Hero(s) Of The Day.
- There's no way Kermit can cope with Metalica playing TenaciousD covers! Even though the muppet band strike up a counter tune full of funky sax and improvised drum solos...the sonic resonance of the pounding baseline pulverises the pitiful frog Ms Piggy cries on Scooter's shoulder...
- PUNK ROCK TRIED TO DESTROY THE METAL, BUT METAL WAS MUCH TO STRONG KERMIT TRIED TO DEFILE THE METAL, BUT KERMIT WAS PROVEN WROHOHOHONG!!! yeaah! METOL! It comes from HELL!
*Charlie Sheen Award** 'WINNING!' comment
- always with the funny Aaron, much appreciated.
**Charlie Sheen Award not in any way associated with or endorsed by Charlie Sheen
- always with the funny Aaron, much appreciated.
**Charlie Sheen Award not in any way associated with or endorsed by Charlie Sheen
So there you have it. He never really did stand a chance, did he?
(Not a good look, FYI)
The floor is open to suggestions again for Round 14, METOLL vs. an 'N' word.
(Not an invitation to be racist people - I will not publish such comments).
Make your suggestion,
laud The METOLL or say a prayer for Kermit's speedy recovery
in the comments.
laud The METOLL or say a prayer for Kermit's speedy recovery
in the comments.
It's not easy being green...
ReplyDeleteGood luck next time Kermit, you don't got a thing on metal though. Perhaps you're in need of a NECROMANCER to raise you from the dead. (In case you can't guess, Necromancer is my suggestion.)
ReplyDeletedamn, i thought those hipster glasses would help. anyway, i suggest the best rock band in the world to redeem kermit: NICKELBACK!
ReplyDeleteproblem? :D
Nytol, the sweet, sweet lure of the best medicine.
ReplyDeleteWhat about THE N word? Everyone is afraid to go against it, especially white people like Metallica...
ReplyDeleteha take this mupet
ReplyDeleteHow about the nefarious Nickelodeon?
ReplyDeleteHell yeah! and the next N word should be naggers, or, "people that annoy you".
ReplyDeleteNARCISSISM! We all have it, and we all hate it! How will we handle it!?
ReplyDeletePoor Kermit never stood a chance. :(
ReplyDeleteTime for METOLL to take on the raw power of nature.
ReplyDeleteNick Nolte
ReplyDeleteNinjas
or Noodles from The Offspring... you gotta keep'em separated...
Numa Numa guy?
Fran Drescher is... THE NANNY!!!
Metalica is overrated but metal is good
ReplyDeleteN word. So many choices.
ReplyDeletekermit gogo :D
ReplyDeleteKermit, what the hack are you doing? Get back on them green feet and show them muppet power!
ReplyDeleteYESSSSSSSS Metallica Wins, now lets find a good adversary. im going for Ninjas
ReplyDeleteSome great suggestions. Thanks all. One in particular is tweaking interest. ; ]
ReplyDeleteI hope the particular one is the Numa Numa guy. Hot damn that'd be a sweet ass battle.
ReplyDeletePoor hipster Kermit. He wasn't up on his Metal.
ReplyDeleteI'm with Lost...be brave!
ReplyDeleteIt's not easy being a green hipster.
ReplyDeletekermit g0t pwned
ReplyDeleteNyquil, the best cold sleeping medicine there is
ReplyDeleterutroh!!
ReplyDeletepoor kermit xD
ReplyDeletePoor Kermit.
ReplyDeletewhat about meatel?
ReplyDeleteMetoll vs. Full Metal Alchemists.
ReplyDeleteAh well....Kermit had a good run I guess.
ReplyDeleteMetallica sucks though...there I said it. Just because you've been around for a while doesn't make you good, it just means you're too dumb to retire. They will be playing county fairs in five years.
I'm not bitter though...