And so Zippo, we meet again...

Zippo. 

You think you're pretty smart eh? Beating all my followers and then proving yourself worthy vs. aardvark in the bonus round.

Aardvark, who as some will remember, was knocked out in its own bonus round against ALF due to an explicit appeal by 'yours truly'.

Out of curiosity: quick-fire sudden-death bonus round for beloved Zippo against the most popular of the other contenders this 'cycle':

Zippo

Hmmm...

vs.

Engineering

Archie

THEN...

vs.

Kermit

fbf 4 life

THEN...

vs.

Halibut

This is a 'Bastard halibut' apparently.

If you survive each of these previous winners, Zippo, I will deem you worthy of entering Cycle Two as first contestant. I would have entered you right away, but I just want to see you fall on this last hurdle so badly. You, Zippo, (via themselves) insulted my followers and thrashed the one other competitor who would just NOT DIE! And so you must enter the ring against these, the greatest of Cycle One.

So everyone - weigh up your loyalty to Zippo.

Can Zippo beat Engineering, Kermit and halibut in succession?

Let me know in the comments.

Overall Victor anti-climax... and bonus Round I

Well, the last round stayed open for days in the hope that you people would come through for yourselves, but no, votes for Zippo and traumatic Zippo related anecdeotes just kept pouring in.

'You guys' allowed Zippo to slaughter you 2 to 1.

I have to voice my disappointment. This post would have been a celebratory fun-time party post with many features of y'all and slaps on the back all round. But nope...

It's just going to be a picture of a:

Zippo.

You elected Zippo as overall winner of the first 'cycle' of Alphabet Wars.
Nice one.

Well, perhaps one bonus round. Let's bring back:

Vs.

Aardvark

Come on aardvark - you show that lighter how it's done.

Vote Zippo or Aardvark for old time's sake in the comments!

Round 26 - Final Round this go round!

See this cheeky fellow?

Yep, he's lookin' at you!

Staredad complained that he was not in the collage yesterday.
Indeed he was not. Was that because I neglected to include him in it? No. No it wasn't.
It was because he decided to follow after the collage was made and posted.

I said that I would feature anyone who commented that they weren't in the collage, and I am a man of my word.
There you go Staredad, I hope you're happy now!

Check staredad.net if you enjoy those disturbingly funny cartoons.

...And on with the Wars...

In spite of seven masochists among you, you guys beat Unicorn!

And so, last battle of this cycle of Alphabet Wars.

You Lot

(+ Staredad)

Vs.

Zippo

ker-kling!


Vote!

Round 25: Unicorn vs. U! - no wait, 'Y', no, *you*!

Round 24 was the tightest battle yet.
Just about every second vote was for Unicorn, every other for X-men, until the last few comments.
Unicron took a slight lead lead and X-men almost caught up but stumbled at the last hurdle (they did well in the race considering they were up against a horse with wings). 

Photo finish and X-men lost out by one vote.

For those who are saying 'Unicorn 'til the end!', you may reconsider in this round. ; ]

Unicorn

 

I want this van in spite of the implications.

Thanks to Robert Fünf for finding the pic
and posting it in the comments last round.

Vs.

YOU GUYS!

I <3 U ALL!

Seriously, you all ROCK MY WORLD. Thank you to all (almost 150) followers and all the commenters.

I'll say it again, you lot drive this blog idea and without you it would be me crying into my cereal, peering at Aardvark vs. Abba, blurred, through tears of isolation.

Thank you all for your input over the past 24 rounds and the few extra posts. 

I look forward to many more Alphabet Wars with you all in the future! xx

- Alpha Beta

So need you even consider? 

Give yourselves a huge pat on the back and vote for yourselves in the comments!

Unicorn stays single to face X in Round 24

Amid bitterness and divorce, soul drainage and stolen weekends, Weddings did not fare well against Unicorn.

Staredad cast the first of a mere two votes for Weddings
as he intends to propose soon. Squeeee!
LOL at the cartoons he hosts over at Staredad.net

"Was it really much of a contest", you ask? And I must respond, no indeed, I have clearly somewhat rigged the contest for Unicorn by choosing weak opponents these past few rounds, simply so we may all enjoy the best of  Charlie the Unicorn for a few days.

But now comes the time for Unicorn (since the first battle with Technology, here) to face some worthy competition. 

Round 24 is upon us!

Unicorn

Woob w000b!

vs.

X-men!

"But that's not the real"-Shshsh! no one will realise.

Vote your preference, Unicorn or X-men in comments.

Include blow by blow battle descriptions if you are feeling witty and creative
- they may feature in the next post.

Round 23: Unicorn vs. Weddings

It was, of course, a landslide win for Unicorn but I was surprised how many of you weirdoes went for Venga Bus.

Aside from much techno-pop annoyance for poor Unicorn, there were many rainbows (Vague Raconteur), Norse Gods (Aaron M. Gipson), the old dude from Six Flags (Lost.In.Idaho) and a fit of rape (Erika) (nice typo Erika. ; P )

On to the next round so...

Unicorn

Charlie Part 3 - YAY!

vs.

Weddings

Bwahhh! So cute!

Vote Unicorn or Weddings in the comments and the winner faces X.

Round 22 Techno-bus!

Last round, Technology vs. Unicorn was an enthralling competition.

Technology jumped ahead intially and it looked like Lost.in.Idaho might have foresoon Unicron's demise...

Charlie tries to spear tech with his unicorn horn, but he misses the serial port and instead hits the power cord. While tech gets a little seared, Charlie the Unicorn fries. Now, if he had 2 kidneys, he would have survived... but NOOOOOO... he HAD to go to Candy Mountain.... - Lost.in.Idaho 

The battle raged on almost vote for vote - technology consistently in the lead, during which time we had these hilarious comments: 

 

Unicorn: "You cannot defendeth, you cannot attacketh, only a virgin may come near me or touch me. So peeith off!" Technology: "Oh you mean 7/8 of all the people on the internet at any given time?" Technology Wins!  - Aaron M. Gipson
Unicorns are obviously going to win, they will stab technology in a fit of rainbows. -  Kingmush

"Barcode Unicorn" by Lara ´Pookie´ Geltz

 

However, Astronomy Pirate was proven almost correct by the end of the voting and Unicorn came out on top by six votes.

 After Charlie gets fried from his encounter with the power cord, as described by Idaho, something strange begins to happen. Technology rebuilds Charlie. Making him better, faster, stronger. Thus creating the first DRAW in this tourney, UNITECH, the cybernetic unicorn.
- Astronomy Pirate

This leaves us with the dilemma of what to pit Unicorn against. 

A ridiculous battle, but it's too amusing to resist...

Unicorn

Charlie Part 2!


vs.

The Venga Bus!

(I can't believe I just posted this on my blog).

I am guessing that Venga Bus will be trampled into a sheet of tin, but on a site where Halibut beat Engineering anything can happen!

Vote in comments - Venga Bus or Unicorn.

...and don't forget, your witty comments
influence tactics and may feature in the next post.